That’s OK, I went to use the Facebook connect login instead. This appeared to work for a second, then reported;

The page you were looking for doesn’t exist.

You may have mistyped the address or the page may have moved.

But it must have worked; I got an email from ‘support@fairfaxmedia.com.au’ welcoming me on my successful registration. In part this email said:

If you have any questions or need any assistance please do not hesitate to contact us at support@fairfaxmedia.com.au.

However, time to go go to work, nothing to do about it for the moment so put it aside; maybe they’ll organically fix their problem during the day.

Later today, clicked on the login link to login and comment. Same problem, a 404. OK, let’s try emailing that support address – after all, they invited me “not to hesitate” and I already hesitated 7 or 8 hours. What do you think happens?

Delivery has failed to these recipients or distribution lists:

support@fairfaxmedia.com.au
The recipient's e-mail address was not found in the recipient's e-mail system. Microsoft
Exchange will not try to redeliver this message for you. Please check the e-mail address and
try resending this message, or provide the following diagnostic text to your system
administrator.

Sent by Microsoft Exchange Server 2007

Diagnostic information for administrators:

Generating server: ffx.jfh.com.au

support@fairfaxmedia.com.au
#550 5.1.1 RESOLVER.ADR.RecipNotFound; not found ##

Yeah, so that’s a smashing success, then.

(NB. jfh.com.au probably is John Fairfax Holdings, the parent company, it’s registered to FAIRFAX DIGITAL HOLDINGS, so the error above is an internal configuration error in their email system – they are advertising an email address that is non-functional!)

No wonder Fairfax is gurgling down the drain. Their newspapers are increasingly shit, their websites full of “OMG THE BEWBZ!1!” and cheap political sensationalism … now their website is hardly functional and apparently their unpaid work experience h4x0r hasn’t noticed yet. What a bunch of idiots.

“Ok, we will have to design and build some sort of ICBM or buy one, that will cost a lot of money. Also, I’m not even sure you can get an ICBM that’s fast enough for that distance. And have we thought about acquiring land for the launch site or what sort of launch system will we considering?.”

“But I want to do it in my car.”

“Oh, well, that’s a big ICBM, to hurtle that sort of load in that sort of timeframe across that sort of distance. Molto-dinero. Also, re-entry procedures at the New York end could be tricky and …”

“No, I meant, I want my car to be used for the journey.”

“But that’s not possible!”

“What sort of engineer are you? Can’t you just soup it up a little?”

“Well even if we could make your car amphibious, there’s no way it can travel 5,500 kilometres in 12 minutes”

“I don’t want an amphibious car!”

“Have you considered a ship of some type?”

“Yes a ship will get me and my car to New York.”

“Excellent. It takes about a week for a ship to cross the Atlantic I believe.”

“But I just said in my specification that it has to take 12 minutes! Also I wish to travel via the Pacific Ocean, as it is prettier this time of year.”

” … !!! “

In Eclipse’s defence, Intellij IDEA and Netbeans also exhibit identical broken functionality.

For a start, the documentation is merely a series of outlines of brief hints. One measly section.The laughably short Spring 3 doco section 13.5.1.4 “Dealing with multiple persistence units” conveniently omits  the transaction manager configuration from the example. The problem appears to be that the JPA transaction manager only (and compulsorily) deals with one entity manager factory. And an entity manager factory only deals with one persistence unit. So therefore you have to have two JPA transaction managers. Which means the two persistence unit transactions won’t co-operate properly even though they may share the underlying datasource and are configured through the single persistence unit manager bean.

The above scenario is totally trivial in an EJB 3 container backed with Hibernate, or Eclipselink, as the provider. About one-quarter of the configuration. If I have to use a JTA transaction manager obtained by JNDI lookup from the container, to run a transaction across two JPA persistence units which share the same underlying datasource, why the hell am I using Spring in the first place?

All I wanted was to isolate one set of db transactions from another, use JPA persistence units so the two sets of tables could live easily in two different schemas, and use the annotations to kill the fragile AOP regex-like-but-not-like-regex class and method pattern-matching jiggery pokery from the Spring configuration.

My god, this is such a stonkingly non-trivial forest of horrible configuration and a trial and error morass of filthy swamp miasma … an equivalent EJB3 backed by Hibernate JPA set up is, by comparison, an almost effortless task. I can produce a unit-tested all singing all dancing multiple persistence unit JPA app running in an EJB 3 container with XA datasources using Hibernate as the JPA implementation in almost no time at all. Getting the same thing with Spring (oh, and running some tests with Jetty inside Maven) is like having all your teeth pulled while you’re coming down from a three day methamphetamine binge. Getting Spring to run with multiple JPA persistence units on the same JDBC connection (without XA, across the same database connection) with a transaction propagation of REQUIRES_NEW on the entry point of one of the units is a hair-pulling, beard-greying, head-desk banging, co-worker punching, drunken ranting, blood-pressure raising experience of pure horror. Which apparently doesn’t end.

Die, Spring, die. Can’t come soon enough as far as I am concerned. It’s more evil than Oracle. At least you know with Oracle you’re in for an un-lubed hard and fast backdoor job from Ellison with no reach-around before you even unpack the box. Spring is like a beautiful young sexy soft-porn film that turns into some relentlessly horrific succubus-filled horror film half way through.

Seriously, its enough to make one pine for bloody Weblogic. Spring is the new EJB 2.1.

Well, nope.

Especially nope if you hope to use clustered broadcast messaging (i.e. Topics)  to multiple connected clustered application receivers. Unless you cope with multiple versions of the same message in your application code.

Funny thing is, they already have this product that can do clustered broadcast messaging well proper, it’s called Coherence. But if you need the JMS API, not so suitable. However they could use this product to underpin their crappy 10 year old clustered JMS implementation in Weblogic. Do you think they will do that? Anyone want to open a book on it?

Overview

OSB installation in a development environment consists of a completely separate Weblogic instance and yet another ‘special installation’ of Eclipse. You can’t use existing Eclipse installations. Nor is it recommend to use one of the five other existing Weblogic instances that Oracle products thoughtfully demand their own copy thereof (SOA Suite, I am looking at you).

Installation process

This is the procedure for installing OSB development environment.

As network firewall policy prevents the downloading of files, you will need to use installation media located within <companyname> network. Take the files conveniently stored on network server <location redacted> and copy them into a directory on your local computer. This directory is hereafter referred to as ‘installation files directory’ below.

Install Weblogic

1. Go to the installation files directory.
2. Run the executable file wls1033_oepe111150_win32.exe
3. This action launches the Oracle Installer for the Weblogic instance. It takes some time to run so contemplate the meaning of your life for a few minutes while it does. Maybe get a cup of tea. Stretch your legs. Think about lunch or your next holiday. File a support request for more memory. You should get at least 8GB.
4. Okay that’s it, you’ll finally see the Oracle Weblogic 10.3.3.0 installer. Think about the fact that Oracle sees fit to put “instructions” on the first screen telling you what the “Next” button does. This is advanced JEE server technology you’re installing, and potentially, Oracle think you don’t know what the “Next” button does. Maybe this reflects the level of experience inside Oracle, or perhaps it is indicative of the depth of respect in which Oracle holds their customers.
5. Press the “Next” button. The next screen you will see  is very important. If you fsck it up you’ll have to uninstall and start over. It does not have any instructions, but that’s OK, we’ve done it here in this wiki page for you. Pay attention.
6. DO. NOT. ACCEPT. THE. DEFAULT. Especially if you installed SOA Suite or some other Oracle product before you installed this one. Double especially if you still want that product to work.
7. SELECT “Create a new Middleware Home” (THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT)
8. TYPE a name of an Appropriate Directory. I used “C:\Oracle\OSB_Middleware”
9. PRESS The “Next” button. Use the “Back” button if you need to see the instructions about how to use the “Next” button that Oracle conveniently provided for you on the first Screen. No, don’t do that. If you do that you’ll probably have to do this proceedure again and it will just make this entire experience last longer than it needs to. This is not a recommended practice.
10. The next screen demands that you give Oracle your Email Address to get “security updates”. It also wants a thing called your “My Oracle Support Password” (I suspect this is what might have been known as Oracle TechNet). As we both know, the best possible security measure is not to give out your password to strange programs that demand it.
11. As I planned on giving them my <workcompany> email, and as my Technet sub doesn’t use that Email address, I also unchecked the “I wish to receive security updated via My Oracle Support” check box.
12. Are you Sure? YES I’M VERY SURE. I would like to be “ignorant of security updates” and also Oracle spam. Ignorance is Bliss.
13. Look at that, I can’t give them my email address after all, what they really meant was “type your Oracle Support user id”. Press “Next”.
14. Now you have to choose whether you want a “Typical” installation or a “Custom” one. I chose “Typical”, which, being an Oracle installation, I expect to require an 8-core 64GB RAM 2TB SAN SSD -based supercomputer with a external 4-way Oracle RAC for configuration (“infrastructure”) DB in order to have enough grunt to service about 3 requests a minute. Press “Next”.
15. There’s a lot of choices here about the various subdirectories under the Middleware Home Directory that you created further back. I recommend accepting the defaults, but you can probably cause yourself countless of fun trolling on the My Oracle Support forums as you get ever-more-desparate for a solution to a very obscure problem that the phone support have no idea about and that was likely caused by you mucking about these defaults, causing the support personel to simply recommend you to reinstall the product, if you really feel the need to change them here.
16. If you can remember the instruction about the use of the “Next” button at step 4, then Press “Next”.
17. Now you can choose whether you want to put the shortcuts for “All users” or just you (“Local user”). If you are the BOFH I recommend “All Users”. As this is the default, we can all safely assume that the BOFH works for Oracle and is now responsible for designing their installation processes. Accept the default, and press “Next”.
18. The next screen is a summary of what you’ll be installing. You can also select each item and see a summary of what it does. Ponder the mystery of Oracle, and press “Next”.
19. Keep pondering that mystery while Oracle Weblogic Server 11g Release 1 (10.3.3.0) is installed. It takes a little bit of time. While it does that, you might to book that Holiday, get another cup of tea, or chase up that support request for the additional RAM you’ll be soon needing.
20. Congratulations! Installation is complete.
21. I opted to leave the “Run Quickstart” option checked.
22. Press “Done”. There are no onscreen instructions for this button.
23. Quickstart will run. It’s just a link farm.

Install Oracle Enterprise Pack for Eclipse (OEPE aka “Special Eclipse”)

1. Go to the installation files directory
2. Extract the file oepe-galileo-all-in-one-11.1.1.5.0.201003170852-win32.zip … I used 7zip and made sure to put it into a subdirectory of the installation files directory.
3. It’s kind of pretty big, takes a cople of minutes.
4. Just like a regular version of Eclipse, once this is unzipped, it’s installed. However it’s not a regular version of Eclipse. It is a “special” Eclipse that went to “special” school.
5. Although this directory can probably live anywhere, it’s a good idea to copy this directory into the new Oracle Middleware Home that you created when you installed Weblogic. Look I really have no idea why this is the case, however, it’s not good to anger the Oracle by using you regular development directories. ORACLE_HOME sweet ORACLE_HOME it is then.

Install OSB and OSB Dev Tools

1. Go to the installation files directory.
2. Extract the file ofm_osb_generic_11.1.1.3.0_disk1_1of1.zip … again I used 7zip and made sure to put it into a directory underneath the installation files directory.
3. Enter this directory. Enter the directory “osb” that will be created underneath it. Note that even though the file said “disk1_1of1″ in the file name that underneath here there’s two directories, Disk1 and Disk2.
4. Go into the directory “Disk1″
5. Run the executable file “setup.exe”
6. A DOS window opens which asks you for the location of a JRE in order to use Oracle Universal Installer. Probably. Exactly why the Weblogic installer didn’t need to know where the JDK was, I do not know. Probably it used a sensible installer rather then the Oracle Universal Installer. I don’t ever think I’ve ever seen an machine with two Oracle installations on it that didn’t also have two or more installations of the Oracle Universal Installer also installed on it. Its name perhaps means that it installs itself universally, rather than it is a product which has a universal use for installing other software. Ponder the mystery of the Oracle.
7. A JRE will be located in the original Oracle Middleware Home that you created when you installed Weblogic. In fact there’s at least two (Sun JDK and JRockit). Use the Sun JDK. For example, my value for the JDK was “C:\Oracle\OSB_Middleware\jdk160_18″. Press Enter.
8. Now the Universal Installer will actually attempt to install something. It says “You are about to install the Oracle Service Bus (OSB) and may install the Oracle Service Bus IDE and Oracle Service Bus Examples (OSBE). Before proceeding, make sure that you have installed and configured Oracle WebLogic Server 11g. If you want to design OSB applications in Eclipse, make sure Oracle Enterprise Package for Eclipse (OEPE) is installed.” Which is all true if you’ve been following this guide.
9. Press “Next”. There’s no instructions in this program for the use of the “Next” button. Someone ought to file a change request for that.
10. Now you can choose whether you want a “Typical” installation or a “Custom” one. Typically, choose “Typical”.
11. Press “Next”. I tried looking for online help here about the use of the “Next” button but I did not find anything.
12. It does a prerequisite check. It should pass, and if it doesn’t, you are probably screwed. If it does, you will be able to Press “Next”
13. At this next screen DO NOT ACCEPT THE DEFAULTS.
14. Choose the Oracle Middleware Home that you installed the Weblogic into at the first part of this installation procedure. E.g. I chose “C:\Oracle\OSB_Middleware”.
15. Once you do the previous step, ff you followed the instructions for the Special Eclipse (OEPE), it will have found it automatically. If not, choose the location where you installed the Special Eclipse (OEPE Location). For example, my value was “C:\Oracle\OSB_Middleware\oepe-galileo-all-in-one-11.1.1.5.0.201003170852-win32″
16. Press “Next”. Did you know that the Oracle at Delphi was a priestess called the ‘Pythoness’ who answered your question using gibberish verse. A Male Attendant of the Pythoness interpreted her raving mad gibberings and told you what they meant. For a fee. Does this sound familiar?
17. Review the installation details. When you are sure they are correct, press “Install”.
18. OSB will now install. It takes a little time so run those errands, go to lunch, get a coffee, dream of the Holiday you just Booked. I’d tell you to install the new 8GB of memory that you ordered before which surely has arrived by now, but that would mean turning your computer off. Best to wait until it’s finished then.

DAVID DUNNING: Well, my specialty is decision-making. How well do people make the decisions they have to make in life? And I became very interested in judgments about the self, simply because, well, people tend to say things, whether it be in everyday life or in the lab, that just couldn’t possibly be true. And I became fascinated with that. Not just that people said these positive things about themselves, but they really, really believed them. Which led to my observation: if you’re incompetent, you can’t know you’re incompetent.

ERROL MORRIS: Why not?

DAVID DUNNING: If you knew it, you’d say, “Wait a minute. The decision I just made does not make much sense. I had better go and get some independent advice.” But when you’re incompetent, the skills you need to produce a right answer are exactly the skills you need to recognize what a right answer is. In logical reasoning, in parenting, in management, problem solving, the skills you use to produce the right answer are exactly the same skills you use to evaluate the answer. And so we went on to see if this could possibly be true in many other areas. And to our astonishment, it was very, very true.

anon 9:04PM
[about that code]

crazymcphee 9:05 PM
well, it WAS perfect … CRAZY perfect

anon 9:06 PM
lol… no doubt it even spans a 2yr time frame and 2 organisational puchases later, with no impact

crazymcphee 9:07 PM
exactly. all future and past and alternative universe combinations taken care of forever. no changes necessary.

anon 9:08 PM
sweeet… it should be a product

crazymcphee 9:08 PM
oh it already is just not in this instantiation of the multiverse

anon 9:08 PM
this instance has finished run level 3 yet

crazymcphee 9:08 PM
but in those OTHER multiverses, Oracle already bought it for $500mil

anon 9:09 PM
hahaha, i can see you partying with ellison and his geisha girls ;D

crazymcphee 9:09 PM
tried a ‘sudo shutdown’ but something’s threadlocked the kernel

anon 9:10 PM
then I stepped in a core dump

crazymcphee 9:10 PM
that’s why i’m hard at work building a mutiverse portal so i get me a slice of sweet ellison geisha-girl action

and here you are thinking about some OTHER sort of portal when i said i was working on an ‘Oracle 10g Portal Implementation’

anon 9:11 PM
don’t forget to add some proprietary and intrusive components that spread like a virus and grind all the other appservers to dust

crazymcphee 9:12 PM
well, that’s what at least half of those 10^100 multiverses full of new Indian IT grads are working on

I just send them a 500 page spec each month and they will get it to me at sometime before the death of this multiverse

anon 9:13 PM
that means it should be about ready by now, well as in it probably compiles in at least one of those multiverses, will be fully cmm lvl 5, yet not actually do what you asked

crazymcphee 9:13 PM
(oh by ‘spec’ i mean, a drunken rant shouted into my mobile phone on the walk home)

well, yes, but i’m fully expecting it will meet oracle’s stringent marketing requirements

anon 9:14 PM
well shit, they have to do some work, what do they expect, 4 u to write the code as well

yes marketing tickbox on the packaging is the only requirements they really need

crazymcphee 9:15 PM
yeah, i mean, hell, we pay at least $5.50 a day per developer …

oh we don’t tell the DEVELOPERS about the marketing tickbox requirements! they are super-secret. we just slap those on the box at the end. when i say ‘end’ i mean end of the box design process which has been ready for about 8 months now.

The Project Cartoon - how the customer explained it, what we built them & what the customer actually needed

It’s from a site called The Project Cartoon. What I didn’t know was the site allows you to use the little cartoons to make your own version. You can caption and re-order the panels. For your amusement, and perhaps your edification, I present “The Rewrite Will Be Ready Shortly”:

The existing software is ugly and poorly written. We will have to rewrite it if you want any new features.